The holiday season is upon us and, if you recently finalized your divorce, you might have some concerns regarding your plans for celebrating and embracing the spirit of this festive time of year. During your marriage, you and your spouse likely created numerous holiday traditions with your children, and it will undoubtedly be difficult for them to cope with the fact that many of these traditions must end in the aftermath of your divorce. However, instead of dwelling on this loss, you can use this opportunity to create your own traditions with the children and strengthen your bond.
Making the Right Adjustments
You do not have to get rid of old traditions for the sake of it. If some of your holiday traditions still have a place in your life and bring your children joy, hang onto them. In some cases, all you might need are some minor alterations. In others, you might need to do a complete overhaul and create a new tradition. Ask your children for their input. Maybe there is an activity they always wanted to do over the holidays, but it clashed with the traditions you and your spouse set.
Creating traditions will take time, so do not expect it to happen overnight or within a single season. Just as you and your spouse spent years creating memorable traditions, you and your children will need time to build up new traditions that you can look forward to and cherish.
Here are some tips to get you started:
- Be civil with your ex-spouse: Anger breeds more anger, so show some kindness toward your co-parent to avoid getting involved in unnecessary bickering. If you spend less time being angry with each other, you can spend more time focusing on the time you have with your children.
- Understand your children’s triggers: Your children have their own feelings about your divorce and the holidays, so try to be sensitive and understanding. If they seem sad, do not put pressure on them to cheer up or enjoy the holidays. Let them know that it is normal to have these feelings and that, despite the recent changes, you can all still enjoy the holiday season together.
- Learn to be flexible: Although you have a holiday parenting schedule in place, things might come up that require some flexibility. You and your co-parent should work together and be reasonably flexible to ensure everyone has a good holiday with the kids. In addition to reducing conflict, these acts of kindness will help you and your co-parent build a healthier relationship.
- Do not forget to laugh: As the adage goes, laughter is the best medicine. Sometimes being silly and laughing together is one of the most effective ways to drive the old ghosts and hurt feelings away. However, the holidays are often so hectic that we forget to laugh. Take a breath and remind yourself to share some laughs with your kids.
Discuss Your Case with an Attorney Today!
If you are faced with a family law matter that requires legal assistance, the team at Friedman & Friedman PLLC, Attorneys at Law has the legal expertise necessary to assist you with your case. We understand the difficulties divorced parents face during the holidays and can help you navigate these challenges.
Call us today at (516) 688-0088 to schedule a consultation.